the older i get, the more sensitive to noise i am.

i’ve always hated the sound of fingernails on chalkboards, smacking food, and popping gum. but as each year passes, i add more and more sounds to my roster of “i can’t take this”:

• typing
• chewing
• clearing throats
• utensils scraping on plates
• thumping bass
• etc.

you get the point.

what is wrong with me? i used to think, “oh well, just a little neurotic quirk, no biggie.” but now, i’m alarmed that ordinary, everyday noises really and truly bother me. i live with headphones stuck in my ears when i’m at work. i can’t go to the movies, because instead of hearing the movie, all i hear are people around me crunching on popcorn or chewing licorice. going out to eat is another adventure if i know that the restaurant will be quiet enough to hear other people.

obviously this is bigger than a minor neurotic quirk. it affects my ability to work, to go out, to enjoy life. i wonder if this is a manifestation of the mild form of OCD that i have? if so, i wonder if there’s some sort of behavioral modification that would help? i don’t want to take the time to go to a therapist only to have medication thrown at the problem.

currently listening to: twilight from the album “from a basement on the hill” by elliott smith